Can You Be Happy Without Sex?


I picked up the Sunday magazine last week and as I glanced over the cover, one headline caught my eye – Can you be happy without sex? Sex usually catches my attention.

Right now, you’re either saying one of two things to yourself – Yes, I haven’t had sex in a while, and I’m happy or your response is a flat out No.

Those of you with the latter response, you may continue about your day. Go forth and orgasm deeply.

For the rest of you, sit down. We need to talk.

What’s the big deal with sex?

You can take it or leave it. You’re not that fussed by it. Maybe it’s been so long you can’t even really remember what it feels like. It’s nice and all, but you’re fine without it, right?

Except, you’re not. If you were honest, you’d see your life kinda sucks right now. You’re stale in your career or business. Paying off your debt, or getting that pay-rise is a constant yearning that is never fulfilled. Your optimal health and fitness is just out of reach, and your ideal weight? Forget about it.

Sexual energy is life force energy

Without your sexual juices flowing, everything else dries up too – creativity, inspiration, motivation, excitement and energy – dried up, shrunk down, left the building.

Sex is the ultimate pleasure. You came here through sex. The whole human race exists because of sex, and it cannot continue to exist without sex.

 And you think you’re fine without it?

Just to clarify, I am not saying that sex is the way to happiness, and that you have to carry on like a hormonal teenager to be happy. There may be times when you consciously choose to abstain from sex for a certain purpose, or to achieve a certain goal, and that can be beneficial. However, if you’ve just somehow found yourself in a rut, missing this vital piece, don’t kid yourself. Your life will be lacking in some way. You will not experience the fullness, the richness, and the deliciousness of what life has to offer you.

As a society, we are severely under-pleasured. Not just sexual pleasure, but any and all types of pleasure. You have been lead to believe pleasure is bad – pleasure will make you fat, pleasure will get you into trouble – and so you have restricted the amount of pleasure you feel in your everyday. But here’s the thing; you need more pleasure in your life, not less. Pleasure is not the enemy. Deprivation is. You are so under-pleasured, you turn to bingeing on chocolate, ice cream, wine, TV, rom-coms, (insert your vice here) just to feel something.

 You need to start experiencing more pleasure on a daily basis

And what better way than through a little hanky-panky.

Now, before you say That’s fine for you, but I don’t have anyone to get freaky with, stand yourself up, walk over to a mirror and take a peek. Say Hello. You are someone to get freaky with. Start on your pleasure hunt today. The more you are willing to give yourself the pleasure you are so starved for, the quicker you’ll call in someone else who wants to pleasure you, and the easier it’ll be for you to let them know exactly how they can pleasure you.

The more sex you have, the more sex you will have.

You didn’t come here for fine. You weren’t put here, in this body, at this time, on this planet, for fine. Do you know what the odds of you being born are? One in 400,000,000,000 (that’s 4 hundred trillion) Think about that for a second. One in 400,000,000,000.

 You did not come here for fine.

You came here to create something amazing; to experience joy, pleasure, ecstasy, connection and communion. Embark on your return to sex. Start your pleasure hunt today, and get those juices flowing in all areas of your life.

  • Where do feel dried up, stale, stagnant in your life?
  • How can you go about bringing more sex into your life?
  • Have you started having sex after a dry-spell, and noticed the flow on effects in other life areas?


Brooke x

The Art of Letting Go



As we move through life, we humans tend to accumulate a lot – material things, friendships, various time, energy and money commitments, emotions, beliefs, ideals – and yet we rarely take the time to question, or observe, our trinkets.

We unconsciously buy into the societal ideal of more, and spend a great deal of our time in the acquisition of those things in the hope they will make us feel better, happier, sexier, more important, more free.

What we fail to realise is that all those possessions actually restrict our freedom, and keep us tied to a person, place, time, or a way of being. These things become our excuse for why we can’t do the things we actually want to do –

 I can’t relocate; I’ve got too much stuff!

I can’t start dating again; I’m still grieving my ex (from a year ago!!!)

I can’t start my own business; I’ve got a family to support

I can’t have great sex; I’ve got too many body hang ups

What if you could just LET GO?

What if you took stock of everything in your life and got really clear about whether these things actually serve you and then, let go of the ones that don’t? How would your life be different without them in it?

What are you clinging onto? Why are you afraid to let go?

When we let go – whether it be of a belief, a way of being, a person or an object – we free up energy. We create space for something else to come into our life. We have no way of knowing what that thing will be, but without space, nothing new can enter.

If you feel stuck or stale in any area of your life, you’ve got some work to do! Go though your wardrobe, your fridge, your pantry, your underwear drawer (seriously, when was the last time you wore those old, holey panties?? Let ‘em go darling), your wallet, your make up bag, your book shelves, your desktop, that second drawer in your kitchen, that third drawer in your kitchen, your Facebook friends, your real life friends….everything is up for grabs here.

I used to be afraid to let go of my books (I LOVE books; the feel of them in my hands, turning down the corners of pages I want to come back to, underlining and highlighting inspiring passages as I read). I wanted them nearby so I could read them again and refer to them whenever I needed. I read a lot, and so my collection was huge, and varied, and every time I moved, they were the heaviest, bulkiest things I had to move. But still, I lugged them from place to place, year after year, just so they could be close to me. They brought me a feeling of security and comfort.

How ridiculous is that?

I was so tied to these books, I made my life more difficult by hanging on to them. And the thought that they’d be gone if I didn’t hold on, is even more ridiculous – I’ll always carry their content within me, and any time I get the urge to re-read one of them, someone I know, somewhere in the world will have it, and will be able to get it to me in a matter of days. Worst-case scenario, I can download it and have it on my Kindle in a matter of minutes!

Security doesn’t come from books. Comfort doesn’t come from books. Neither does love, or happiness, or excitement, or any of the other things you are searching for. These also don’t come from that over stuffed fridge you have, your outdated wardrobe of clothes that don’t fit properly, or look anything less than amazing, but which you want to keep “just in case you need them one day”. You won’t find them in that pile of clutter on your bedside table, your coffee table, in your garage or your bathroom either. Nope, not in all those old receipts and store cards that are jamming up your wallet. And definitely NOT in that shoe box of old photos of you and your ex from high school!

 Love. Happiness. Security. Comfort. Excitement.

These come from within you, and are developed and realised when you are living a life you love. You cannot live that life fully whilst you are bogged down in all that crap!

So, beautiful, it’s time to get cleaning, clearing and making space. Pick one area of your life and get ruthless. Anything that is old, broken, chipped, stained, outdated, stretched, past its use-by, goes. Anything that hasn’t been used in 6 months or more (3 if you want to get really ruthless) goes. Anything that you are hanging on to “just in case” goes.

Pay attention to the things you want to hang onto, and dig a little deeper. Ask;

  • What purpose does holding onto this item serve?
  • What am I afraid will happen if I let it go? Is there any truth in that?
  • What would I do without it?

Still can’t quite let it go? Place it into a box in the back, or top, of your wardrobe. If it’s still there in 1 month, get rid of it.

Once you’ve finished, be very mindful of filling that space with something else, just for the sake of it. Space can make us feel a little uncomfortable, but remember, it is into that open space that something new will be pulled. Keep it open, and see what you are gifted with.

Happy clearing gorgeous

Brooke xx



Yes. I said panties