“Stuck” is one of the most powerless places to be, and yet there are some very simple things you can do, to get yourself “un-stuck” and start moving forward.
Check out the short video below to learn what you can do now, to get some momentum back in your life
You’ve heard before that it takes 21 days to create a new habit, right? Well, if you’ve ever stuck to something for 21 days only to have that new habit fall apart on you, this might explain why and help you stay on track for future goals.
Firstly, according to neuroscience (which deals with the function of the nervous system and the brain), it takes anywhere between 66 and 365 days for a new pattern in your brain to become a network that runs automatically.
So, for that new pattern to become an unconscious habit (meaning, you don’t have to think about it, or put conscious effort into doing it. It’s just something you do automatically, like driving a car) it takes anywhere from 2.5 months to 1 whole year, not 21 days!
Think about how often you’ve gone to a course, read a book or listened to a podcast and gotten really inspired and motivated to make a change. And you do, but after a few days, or weeks, that initial enthusiasm has faded, reality kicks in, it feels “too hard”, or like it takes “too much time or effort”, and you let it slip for 1 day, then 2, then 3 and then it’s gone completely. You think it didn’t
work, when you just didn’t do it long enough to create the new habit.
Secondly, one of the most critical pieces in creating unconscious, or automated, habits and behaviours is repetition. We need to repeatedly do the thing we are wanting to install, over and over and over. This is how our new neural pathways get created and solidified, and it’s how we train our thoughts and emotions to align with what we are wanting to create. So when we do something 10 times, it’s nowhere near as powerful as doing it 100 times, or 365 times, and when we take a day off, it has a big impact. Consistency is key here – do the same thing every day. Build the repetition and that habit embeds deeper and more powerfully.
Know that whenever we take on a new habit or behaviour, there’s the initial enthusiasm and energy, followed by challenge and resistance. If, in these times of resistance, we remember that it takes between 66 and 365 days for that new habit to become fully automated, and that repetition is one of the most critical pieces, this can help us stay on track and continue to do what needs to be done today, so we can have what we want tomorrow.
Now go create some awesome new habits, and keep going until you get them locked down!
The boy thought about it, and asked, “Grandfather, which one wins?”
The old man quietly replied, “The one you feed.”
It’s so easy to feed the evil wolf; to get stuck in our story about why things are the way they are, why we’ll never be good enough to have the things we want. It’s easy to point the finger and blame people and things, and to resent others for their success; to feel jealous of their good fortune. It’s easy to stay stuck in our anger, and our stories around all the ways we were hard done by. It’s easy to criticise ourselves; to put ourselves down, to tell ourselves why we don’t deserve the things we want, to be mean to ourselves.
It’s easy because we are taught from a young age to feed this wolf. We’re SO experienced at feeding this wolf, that it’s now a habit, it’s unconscious, we easily slip into these old ways and patterns of behaviour, and a lot of the time, we don’t even realise we’re doing it!
It’s easy to feed that wolf, but living that life is anything BUT easy. It’s hard – REALLY hard. We keep ourselves isolated and disconnected. We keep ourselves small, and give away our power. We play victim. We never get to have the things we want, or if we do, we never fully enjoy them. Resentment, powerlessness, anger, lies, greed, inferiority all create tension in the body which block the flow of our life force energy. Over time, this block creates injury, illness, disease, and weight gain.
It takes courage to come from love; to be grateful and appreciative for all that we have, to trust that everything will work out for us, to know that we too can change our life and create that which our hearts most desire. Forgiveness takes courage. Loving ourselves takes courage; treating ourselves with respect, being kind to ourselves, appreciating all the things our body does for us on a daily basis – are all hard to do when you live in a world that tells you you are not enough or worthy of any of that until you look a certain way. It takes strength and courage to feed this wolf, to live this life – Do you think it’s worth it?
I know you’re on your journey towards the best version of you; healthy, vibrant, energetic, happy, calm, loving, accepting.
You’re working your little tush off to get yourself to the place where you can finally love and accept yourself. Where you can be happy to look in the mirror, or see photos of yourself. That place where you are that fun loving, social, adventurous woman, who says yes to life, yes to dating, yes to sex, to opportunities, to explorations. That woman who is not held back in any way, not by her body, not by her mind, not by her fear or uncertainty.
This is SO important to you! You put in so much time, effort and energy, pushing yourself, being strict with yourself and reprimanding yourself when you slip up.
You restrict yourself, deprive yourself, punish yourself. You have to be hard on yourself or you’ll never get there. That’s how you have to do this, right?
Find out why this journey can never get you where you want to go, and what you must do instead, by checking out my quick video below.
What can you change in your journey, starting today, so that it more closely resembles the destination you are aiming for?
I’m sure you’ve been there many times; you’re frustrated with your ability to lose weight and you want results NOW – well, actually, yesterday, but you’ll settle for now.
Then someone comes across your path – maybe you bump into them, or you see something pop up on the internet or Facebook, or you see it on TV. It’s someone who’s recently lost a tonne of weight by following some new plan or program, or by taking some new supplement, or shake. And it’s only taken them the tiniest amount of time to do it.
“That’s it!” you say, and you feel the excitement start to build. “That’s the thing that’s going to get me where I want to go. It’s going to finally help me shed this excess weight and give me the body I want!”
The possibilities are running through your mind – everything that you’ve been putting off, is now so close.
You can’t wait to get your hands on that plan or product and get into it. You whip out your wallet, purchase it online and wait impatiently for the day it is delivered into your anxious little hands.
Then, finally, it arrives, and you dive straight in, vowing to do it perfectly, and excited to start seeing your results. You don’t have to wait too long – things are starting to shift and you’re feeling really good – if it keeps going like this, you’ll be where you want to be in no time at all!
“Yes!” you think to yourself. “Finally! I’m so happy!”
But fast forward a few weeks or months, or even years, and you’re back where you started from, maybe even worse off. One more failure to add to your already sizeable collection
You know why too – it’s because you lack willpower, commitment and motivation….. Or is it?
Maybe there’s some other thing at play here. Maybe it’s not that there is something wrong with you…..
Have you ever wanted something so bad, you can taste it, you can see it, you can feeeeeeel it. You set about going about making it happen – you tell others, maybe make some enquiries, google a few things, take some action….. but for some reason, you just haven’t gotten what you want yet.
And it’s driving you crazy! You don’t understand, I mean, what else can you do? Why hasn’t it happened already? Why is it so hard for you? Why does it feel like you take 3 steps forward, and 5 steps back. Why does everyone else seem to have it so easy?
But, before you do that, promise me you’ll watch this video. PROMISE?? It’ll give some powerful insight into why this is happening, AND what you can do about it. Understand and follow these principles and I guarantee things will shift for you. Yep. Guarantee.
Click below to check it out. You promised 🙂
We have officially launched our new program –
Master Your Relationship with Your Food. Transform Your Body. Ignite Your life
…….. and I am beyond excited!
After running my first 8 week program late last year and learning what worked, what could have been done better, and what really impacted my clients and facilitated their biggest breakthroughs, I’ve completely reworked and upgraded the program, and the finished product is out of this world!
One of the biggest changes is that I’ve now included a full Breakthrough Experience for every single member.
Why is this a big deal?
It’s 5 hours, 1-on-1, deep, transformational coaching, where we are going to clear your limitations and set you up with the exact strategies you need to be able to gain the results you desire, in any area. We are busting everything that stands in your way, so you can move forward with total ease, flow, clarity and potential.
Oh, and on top of that, you can also upgrade to get on-going 1-on-1 coaching with me throughout the group program.
I cannot wait to run this, and know there are going to be epic breakthroughs for every single woman.
Want to know more?
Check out the above video first, and if this resonates with you, if this is what you are ready for, contact me to set up your no obligation clarity call. I am only taking 12 women for this program, and am currently booking calls for this week. If you want in, or just want to know more, reach out now to secure your spot today.
- email: email@example.com
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Brookesurteescom/
- mobile: 0405 258 220 (make sure you leave a message!)
I’d love to have you transform with us.
Today I want to share an idea with you that my first coach taught me.
We live in moments
How often have you written off a whole entire day, week, month, or even year, because you’ve acted in some way that isn’t in alignment with where you want to be?
Maybe you ate something off your plan, and so you thought I’ll start again tomorrow, or on Monday.
Maybe you’ve been procrastinating on a project all morning, so you take the afternoon off work, and spend the whole time playing on Facebook, or catching up on personal admin.
Maybe you woke up in a bad mood, or something happened early in your day that put you in a bad mood, so you decide to let it ruin your whole day, and you proceed to be an absolute bitch, or negative nelly, to anyone and anything you come across. You waste your whole day, then go to bed, hoping that when you wake up tomorrow things will be different.
We’ve all been there. Me, more often than I’d like to admit.
We have this idea that our life is made up of hours, days, weeks, months or years, so when something happens we don’t like, we unconsciously decide that one thing has to affect us for that entire time period.
We’ve got it so wrong
We live in moments. Not hours. Not days. Not longer. Moments. Your life is made up of these tiny moments, one after the other, and they are what forms the shape of your hour, your day, your week, month and year. Your lifetime.
Understanding that you live in moments, gives you freedom and immense power. No matter what happens, in the very next moment, you can choose a different scenario. If this moment is shitty, change something, anything, so your next moment is better. Made a poor decision? No problem. Simply choose something different, right now. Acted in a way you aren’t proud of? Act differently in the next moment.
With immense power, comes immense responsibility
Knowing that you live in moments enables you to constantly improve your reality, but it all comes down to choice. It’s recognising you have the power to choose. It’s taking full responsibility for your experience. It’s deciding to not wallow in a poor decision, that either you made, or that was made for you. It’s deciding to always choose something better.
You can choose to allow one moment to dictate the next, and the next and the next. You can allow one moment to mean a shitty day, week, month or year. Or you can choose to turn that around. Right now. In this moment.
We live in moments
What will you choose?
I woke up yesterday with a little knot in the bottom of my belly, and one thought running through my head ~
F**k, what have I done?
You’ve been there right? You know that feeling ~ It comes on right after you make some sort of big statement, commit to something, or lock in something that’s a stretch for the person you are now.
In the past, this feeling, this thought, would stop me dead in my tracks, causing me to back pedal like a cartoon character. I’d do whatever I could to get myself out of whatever it was I’d recklessly committed myself to. Seriously, how could I have been so stupid to think that I’d be capable of that? You smoking crack girl??
I would be paralysed by the fear of being seen, of failing, of something unknown.
So I’d shrink, rushing straight back inside the safety of my comfort zone, where I could stay small, unseen, unchallenged.
Now I know this feeling is the exact feeling I want for my life.
This feeling lets me know that whatever I’ve committed to ~ whatever crazy idea I’ve come up with ~ is the thing that’s going to help me to grow. I feel this because it’s outside of my comfort zone ~ there are things I’m going to have to learn and implement to make this possible and I’m going to have to get to work to make it happen. I’m going to have to challenge things I previously believed. I’ll butt up against the myriad ways I limit myself, and I’ll have to find ways to release those shackles. I’ll have to do things that feel awkward for me. It’ll be a huge stretch for me, but if I weren’t capable of it, I wouldn’t have had the idea in the first place.
If something is just scary, there’s probably a great reason why you shouldn’t do that thing. It’s your intuition, the universe, or God, telling you Hey! Stay away! Your life is in danger in some way if you continue down this path.
If something is just exciting, by all means feel free to do it, but just know that it is inside your comfort zone. It’s easy for you, and therefore you don’t have to grow in order to do it.
However, when you come up with that beautiful blend of scary and exciting, you have found something that will take you closer to the person you want to become. Pursuing it will cause you to grow in ways you don’t even know are possible, and it will be the catalyst for great change in your life. It takes courage to adopt and live by the Scary and Exciting philosophy, but it is so worth it.
So now, rather than that feeling turning me around and shoving back inside my box, I allow it to motivate me and nudge me forward ~ into discomfort, learning and growth. Into freedom.
- What are 3 things that are scary and exciting for you?
- Which one will you commit to now, and see how it plays out?
Want to know what the decision was that prompted my latest Scary and Exciting feeling? Keep your eyes peeled next week for all the juicy goss. It’s so exciting. And so scary. And is going to be so fun. And I’m going to need your help to pull it off! And I wonder how many more times I can start another sentence with and. And I’m stopping now.
Is the scary of your scary and exciting just too big for you? Unsure of how to move with that fear? Get in touch, I love helping people move through fear to bring dreams into reality. Or contact Peter Shaw. He’s the king of Scary and Exciting.