The other day I heard my neighbour calling out to someone in her house. The person obviously didn’t her, and so without changing anything, she called out again, and again and again. Listening to this, I shook my head, thinking “Dude, she can’t hear you. There’s no point standing there, calling out to her when she clearly cannot hear you. Change something – maybe go see if you can find her, but just do something different from what you’re doing now!” You’ve had that same reaction, right?
It got me thinking about how we do this with weight loss.
We try one approach, and it doesn’t work, so we try the same approach again, just in a different package.
We try one diet, and it’s good initially but we can’t stick to it, so we gain the weight back and then go looking for the next diet…which works initially, but, again, we can’t stick to it, so we gain the weight back….and go looking for the next diet, and the next, and the next. And all this time, we think there’s something wrong with us, because we can’t make these work, when the reality is the strategy is wrong. Diet and exercise alone just simply don’t work for lasting weight loss – if that strategy were going to work, it would have worked already!
If you were in the scenario above, you wouldn’t think there’s something wrong with you, and then go into beating yourself up because someone couldn’t hear you calling out to them. You’d simply think to yourself “They can’t hear me” and you’d try a different strategy until you got the outcome you desired. Simple.
And yet we don’t do this with our weight loss.
True power and freedom in your weight loss will come when you ditch the strategies that don’t work, in favour of those that do. If you’re not where you want to be, what you’re doing isn’t working. Plain and simple. If you want to get where you want to go, you’ve got to do something different.
Do you need to ditch your current failing strategy in favour of one that really works?
CLICK HERE NOW to get a weight loss strategy session with me. Complimentary spaces are limited and are reserved for those women who are truly ready to take responsibility and do what it takes to transform.
Don’t sit on a losing strategy any longer – procrastination gets you nowhere. For things to change, things have to change. Let’s get this done!
SPACES ARE LIMITED
I’m sure you’ve been there many times; you’re frustrated with your ability to lose weight and you want results NOW – well, actually, yesterday, but you’ll settle for now.
Then someone comes across your path – maybe you bump into them, or you see something pop up on the internet or Facebook, or you see it on TV. It’s someone who’s recently lost a tonne of weight by following some new plan or program, or by taking some new supplement, or shake. And it’s only taken them the tiniest amount of time to do it.
“That’s it!” you say, and you feel the excitement start to build. “That’s the thing that’s going to get me where I want to go. It’s going to finally help me shed this excess weight and give me the body I want!”
The possibilities are running through your mind – everything that you’ve been putting off, is now so close.
You can’t wait to get your hands on that plan or product and get into it. You whip out your wallet, purchase it online and wait impatiently for the day it is delivered into your anxious little hands.
Then, finally, it arrives, and you dive straight in, vowing to do it perfectly, and excited to start seeing your results. You don’t have to wait too long – things are starting to shift and you’re feeling really good – if it keeps going like this, you’ll be where you want to be in no time at all!
“Yes!” you think to yourself. “Finally! I’m so happy!”
But fast forward a few weeks or months, or even years, and you’re back where you started from, maybe even worse off. One more failure to add to your already sizeable collection
You know why too – it’s because you lack willpower, commitment and motivation….. Or is it?
Maybe there’s some other thing at play here. Maybe it’s not that there is something wrong with you…..
I used to be SO rigid when it came to health…..yeah, ok, everything…. and learning to let go of this rigidity has expanded my health, and my entire life, in many ways.
Practising curiosity allowed me to drop the arrogance that my mind knew what was best, and to start experimenting with how my choices affect my body, my energy and my vitality. In this way, the choices I make now (most of the time….it’s a journey:) are based on actual experience and personal truth, rather than what someone else has told me is ‘best’ for me.
If you want to know what is best for you, you want to incorporate the practises of curiosity and awareness. No one knows your body better than you do 🙂
We have officially launched our new program –
Master Your Relationship with Your Food. Transform Your Body. Ignite Your life
…….. and I am beyond excited!
After running my first 8 week program late last year and learning what worked, what could have been done better, and what really impacted my clients and facilitated their biggest breakthroughs, I’ve completely reworked and upgraded the program, and the finished product is out of this world!
One of the biggest changes is that I’ve now included a full Breakthrough Experience for every single member.
Why is this a big deal?
It’s 5 hours, 1-on-1, deep, transformational coaching, where we are going to clear your limitations and set you up with the exact strategies you need to be able to gain the results you desire, in any area. We are busting everything that stands in your way, so you can move forward with total ease, flow, clarity and potential.
Oh, and on top of that, you can also upgrade to get on-going 1-on-1 coaching with me throughout the group program.
I cannot wait to run this, and know there are going to be epic breakthroughs for every single woman.
Want to know more?
Check out the above video first, and if this resonates with you, if this is what you are ready for, contact me to set up your no obligation clarity call. I am only taking 12 women for this program, and am currently booking calls for this week. If you want in, or just want to know more, reach out now to secure your spot today.
- email: firstname.lastname@example.org
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Brookesurteescom/
- mobile: 0405 258 220 (make sure you leave a message!)
I’d love to have you transform with us.
I know you are either on your journey to being the healthiest, leanest, sexiest version of yourself, or you are wanting to start your health and weight loss journey.
You read up on the best ways to eat and to move your body for weight loss and you implement what you learn. You drink 2L of water every day, you eat your veggies and avoid (as much as possible) junk food, and foods you’ve been told are detrimental to your weight loss and health goals.
And this gets you so far. You initially notice a difference in how you feel, maybe you have a little more energy, and you lose a little weight.
But inevitably, you get to a point where all this information about what to eat, and how to move your body seems to stop working. And you don’t understand what went wrong, so you go looking for the next expert to tell you all about the “next big thing”, and so the cycle starts, and so it continues.
Mainstream health and weight loss information focuses so much on what we should be eating, but the fact that we know this, and we follow this, and we still have issues losing, or maintaining weight, shows us that there is something missing.
I was recently interviewed and asked the question “What is your best meal choice tip?”, and I think my answer might surprise you. I believe, it is one of the missing pieces in weight loss and health knowledge, and I wanted to share it with you, because it is so easy, doesn’t cost anything, and will have a dramatic positive effect on your digestion, your metabolism, your weight, your energy and your vitality. But, there’s a catch – you have to bother to actually do it!
Check out my answer in the video below, and then let me know how you go with implementing this into your journey.
Whether you subscribe to it or not, Valentines Day often leaves many women (and no doubt men too) feeling rather shit about themselves.
It’s so easy to fall into the trap of criticising yourself and blaming the way you look for not having someone who loves you, or for not being “lovable”. This is kind of funny, actually, as this day that is about love, has many women feeling nothing but hatred, shame, criticism, judgement, doubt and fear towards themselves and towards their bodies.
Except if that’s you. Then it’s not funny, but rather painful, lonely and isolating.
We have been taught to relate our self worth, and our value as a human, and as a woman, to how we look. If we look good, if our bodies are “perfect”, then we are worthy, and deserving of love, happiness, joy, success and all the good things. If we are less than perfect, if our thighs jiggle, and our bellies wiggle, if we have stretch marks or cellulite (or heaven forbid, both!) then we are unworthy, undeserving and unlovable. I mean, really, who is going to love you with all those imperfections and lumps and bumps?
And so, you ramp up that life sucking spiral of restriction, deprivation, punishment and hard work, making an unconscious pact with yourself to hate yourself and basically be the worlds biggest bitch to yourself, until you are perfect. Until you lose that extra weight. Until you get rid of your cellulite. Until you look like Giselle, or Beyonce, or whomever that is for you. (For me, it was Pink, and man did I give her a run for her money! But you know what? After years of busting my butt and achieving an awesome body, I still hated the way I looked and I was still single! WTF?!? Clearly there was something missing in this equation.)
This reasoning – trying to perfect the outside, so we feel good on the inside – is so flawed and so outdated!
It’s not a matter of HAVING an awesome body, so we can DO all the things we’ve been putting off, and we can BE lovable, attractive, happy, successful, fun, social, adventurous.
It’s about learning to love the here and now, whatever you look like, however much you weigh and however much you ate at lunch.
It’s learning to BE the type of person who is lovable (by loving yourself, by showing yourself compassion, by being kind to yourself, by having fun with yourself, by putting your needs, your desires and your health first. You can only be loved by others to the extent you can love yourself), and DOING the things that will support your desire for a healthy, vibrant, juicy life (eating the right foods for you, having daily practices of honouring and appreciating your body, connecting to something bigger than you, connecting with the earth, moving your body in ways that feel good, taking yourself on fun adventures with beautiful friends, getting your gorgeous butt out of your lounge room and out into the world).
When you can consistently piece these two together, you have set the stage for you to HAVE those things you want – the sexy body, the vibrant health, the abundant energy, the delicious man, the amazing sex, the awesome friendships and the fun, full social life…and all the rest of it!
It’s not easy to just shift this perspective; to just decide to wake up tomorrow and think “How I look doesn’t define me as a person” when that’s the only thing you’ve been defining yourself by for so long, but it IS possible (and woman! Is it worth it!). I know, I did it, and it took lots of work, lots of help, support, guidance, nurturing, love, patience and the RIGHT information. (The good news here is; I’ve done all the leg work for you!)
If this resonates with you – if you are stuck in that space of fighting your body and trying to hate her into submission – I want you to know there is a better way, a much easier and a much more enjoyable way.
For the remainder of this week, I am opening up my calendar to connect with YOU! I want to hear about where you are in your journey, what your struggle has been, and I want to shed light on why things have been that way for you. In our time together, we’ll get to what is underneath this never-ending cycle you’ve been stuck in, and I’ll give you some tools you can start using right away to begin to turn your body story around. Call it my Valentines gift to you.
I only have a limited number of spots available, so if you are ready to finally be free of all your old body BS, please either comment below, or email me at email@example.com and I’ll get you booked in.
I believe that switched on, embodied and fully expressed women will change the world, but you cannot make the impact you want to make (however “big” or “small” that is), whilst your time and energy is caught up in hating your body, and in your food and weight issues.
You are meant for more than that.
If you are ready to finally be free, please get in contact so we can make that happen
..…and just as a side note, I love you more with your lumps and bumps and imperfections. Especially when you love them for yourself first
Be honest now. How many of you thought I was talking about masturbation just now?
So often when I tell people I work in the field of pleasure, eyebrows raise, people get silly, nervous, embarrassed and always make some comment in relation to sex.
Since when did pleasure = sex? Sex is one of the great pleasures, yes, but pleasure does not equal sex, and sex does not equal pleasure. In fact, for the majority of women, sex is anything but pleasurable.
The word pleasure comes from the Old French word plaisir which means to please.
When I ask if you’ve pleasured yourself today, I want to know if you’ve done anything today that pleases you. Take a moment and just think about that. What have you done today, just because it pleases you? Is there anything? What about this week? This month? This year? Anything? Or are you just hearing crickets?
Maybe you thought Yes, I went to the gym. That pleases me, that makes me feel good. This may be the case, but let me ask you something: did you go to the gym because you actually like it; because it truly gives you pleasure and you like doing it OR did you go because it’s what you’ve been told you need to do to lose weight and have the body you want, and so you think it gives you pleasure because you think it will give you what you desire? Do you actually enjoy the process of going to the gym, or are you just addicted to the endorphins? *** more crickets ***
Not sure? If I said to you right now, Let’s go to the gym, how would you react? Do you get excited and leap out of your chair and say YES! Let’s do it! and race me out the door? Or do you feel the resistance rise up inside you, or a knot, or heaviness inside your belly with one thought permeating through every cell of your being ~ Dear God, no, don’t make me go.
So let me ask you again ~ Have you pleasured yourself today?
Pleasure is such a foreign concept to us women, and in our society, that you may not even be able to tell me the last true pleasure you experienced (and no, that whole block of chocolate does not count as pleasurable. You did not feel pleasure once the wrapper was empty and you felt sick, nauseous, sugar-high along with the guilt, shame and judgement of yourself for having done so). There may be nothing pleasurable back as far as you can remember. Pleasure, who has time for pleasure? I’m so busy with blah blah blah. Maybe a part of you feels you don’t deserve pleasure. That you’re not good/pretty/successful/smart/sexy/thin enough to have pleasure in your life. Maybe you just don’t even know how important, and imperative, pleasure is to your life, to your happiness, to your waistline and to your health.
Pleasure is everything
As women, we have been taught we have to look after everyone else first; make sure all their needs are tended to, and then, and only then, if there are any crumbs left, do we get to have something for ourself.
You need to unlearn this. You need to start putting yourself first. Stop putting your life on hold any longer. You cannot be of service to anyone else when you are so depleted.
Want to make a difference in the world? Want to be the best mother, wife, partner, lover, friend you can be? Then you have to make sure you get what you need first. When your needs are taken care of, when your tank has been filled and is constantly replenished, you have endless energy, compassion and love to share with others. You can give without expectation of return, because nothing you do comes with strings attached. You do it because you feel just so darn good that you can’t not share that with the world. You let go of unrealistic expectations of others because you have already filled all the gaps. Other people can’t disappoint you, they are just free to be themselves and to love you.
This is your job, your work.
You have to look after your own pleasure every single day. Every moment of every day. It’s not up to someone else to do it for you (how long have you been waiting for that to happen? And how is that working out for you?). If someone else is providing your pleasure ~ while you may enjoy it at the time ~ you live in constant fear that they will take it away, and you are powerless to stop them doing so. When it comes from you, no one, no matter how gorgeous or powerful they are, can change that.
Allowing yourself pleasure can be scary at first ~ you will have a myriad of excuses about why you can’t/don’t deserve/don’t have time for it. Recognise those. Acknowledge them and ask yourself Is that really true? Is there any situation where I can/where I do deserve it/where I do have time for it? And then ask yourself the golden questions ~
How can I experience pleasure in this moment?
How can I make this more pleasurable for me?
~ and just do that. Pleasure doesn’t have to be a huge, outlandish expression (although it can be and if that’s what you are feeling, then go for it!) It can be as simple as sitting outside to eat your lunch, playing your favourite music when doing your taxes, eating your dinner by candlelight or wearing your sexiest-date-night-only underwear to work.
Start to look at where you can inject pleasure throughout your day and sprinkle that shiz from morning till night. Do it as if your life depends on it……because honey, it does.
PS ~ Do you find it hard to take on what i’m saying here? You’re not alone, this is the opposite of everything you’ve ever been told about being a woman, about life, about happiness, health and weight loss, so it makes sense you’d have some resistance. But how long will you keep hitting your head against the same brick wall and expecting a different result? It’s time for a new approach ~ one that aligns with you as a woman, and can truly facilitate you living the life that you know is possible, but just haven’t been able to crack yet.
A new approach is coming.
Launching August 15th 2015, More Fun Less Fat will challenge and change everything you ever believed about your body, your worth, your life and your happiness. It’s time to end the struggle once and for all. It’s your time.
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